NO ONE IS TOXIC | Toxic Behavior and Relationships: Gaslighting, Emotional Abuse, and Setting Boundaries
- palak doshi
- Jan 24
- 2 min read
Updated: Jan 25
When someone is abusive, acknowledge their abuse and call it out. Don’t reduce them to a single label like “toxic.”
When someone is overly dependent, set boundaries and ask for space. Avoid calling them “toxic.”
If someone is rude, stand up for yourself. Avoid categorizing them as “toxic.”
When someone tries to manipulate your emotions, focus on becoming assertive. Don’t brand them “toxic.”
If someone causes you pain, share how you feel. Resist the urge to define them as “toxic.”
Labelling someone as “toxic” doesn’t help you handle the situation. It doesn’t change their behavior.And it doesn’t make your life any better.
How often do we hear or use the word “toxic” to describe others?“My partner is toxic.”“My parents are toxic.”“This workplace is toxic.”Even: “I am toxic.”
The word “toxic” literally refers to something harmful or poisonous. But when you call someone toxic, you aren’t simply pointing out harmful behavior—you’re making a sweeping judgment about them as a person.
Let’s consider real scenarios:
Your partner repeatedly gaslights you.
Your parents are constantly critical or dismissive.
A friend overshares or oversteps your boundaries.
Societal norms suffocate you with rigidity and prejudice.
It’s important to recognize harmful behaviors, but does labeling the entire person as toxic actually help?
When you call someone “toxic,” here’s what you’re really doing:
You limit their potential for change. By labeling someone as “toxic,” you unconsciously define them as inherently bad or harmful. The word implies permanence—like they are beyond redemption. Instead of addressing specific behaviors, you dismiss the person entirely.
You disempower yourself. Labeling others as toxic can create a victim mindset. It shifts all responsibility for change away from you. Instead of exploring how you can protect yourself or set boundaries, you resign yourself to self-pity, telling yourself, “This is happening to me because they’re toxic, and I’m powerless to do anything about it.”
What should we do instead? Focus on behaviors, not identities. Calling out gaslighting, abuse, or manipulation helps you recognize and respond to red flags. Setting boundaries, learning assertiveness, and expressing your feelings are all proactive ways to handle harm.
People can grow. Relationships can evolve. But labeling someone as “toxic” shuts the door to both. Shift the conversation. Don’t cancel the person—address the problem.
